Taste and See

"Instead of standing on the shore and proving to ourselves that the ocean cannot carry us, let us venture on its waters just to see" Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Laurel and I are coming up on our 39^th year of marriage, and I’m embarrassed to say that we’ve taken very few vacations together.  Over the years, we took our four children on many visits to grandparents, we did do a Disney trip once with them, but as a couple, we’ve gone on very few.

There was the first one, Virginia Beach, when the girls were little, we went to France when the boys were little, and about five years ago, we went to Niagara Falls.  We had planned to go to France on a yoga retreat last year, and then, well, COVID hit, and that didn’t happen. 

As we were gearing up for the rescheduled trip to France, we started running into some barriers along the way.  We attempted to renew Laurel’s passport, in plenty of time for the trip, and then the State Department greatly extended their wait times after we sent the renewal in.  As many times as we tried to contact them, by phone, e-mail, whatever means, we couldn’t get an answer from anyone.  Eventually, even with the website saying Laurel’s passport was in unknown status, it miraculously arrived. 

As we prepared for the trip, Laurel and I both had trepidation that maybe we shouldn’t be doing this, or maybe something was telling us we shouldn’t go on this trip.  With the COVID numbers rising again, we didn’t know if it was a good idea or not.  To make matters worse, our one son Patrick is getting married the weekend after we are supposed to get back, and if we test positive, we may miss the wedding.  That would be a disaster.

What gnawed at me was the memory from our 25^th anniversary, when I had booked a trip to England and Ireland, only to cancel the trip right before we were supposed to go because of some important work meetings.  I was having those same feelings since this is budget season at work, but I couldn’t bear doing this again to Laurel.  I really wanted to make this work.

The day finally arrived, and we were off.  After a few flights, a long drive, we arrived at just an incredible chateau in the Bourgogne region of France.  We were greeted by our hosts, Sheila Ewers, our yoga teacher, and Mike Ewers.  As we settled in, I started having a mini-panic attack, we shouldn’t have done this.  I shouldn’t be taking a vacation.  I should be working.

You see, I’ve been raised to work.  At one point, my Dad worked 17 years without a single day off, no vacation, no sick day.  While I’ve improved over the years, I don’t vacation well.  I struggle separating from those things that I’m “supposed to do”.  Those rules to live by were coming back to the surface. 

I came for the yoga….

While I wanted to provide a great vacation for Laurel, I came for yoga.  Since Laurel introduced me to  yoga four years ago, my love for the total experience of yoga has grown and grown.  I love the combination of the physical, emotional, spiritual and mental growth I get from my yoga practice.

Before we moved from Georgia, Laurel and I practiced at John’s Creek Yoga.  I have a special appreciation for anyone who teaches, I taught for seven years as an adjunct professor at Georgia Gwinnett College, and while I always appreciated teachers for what they do, my respect grew even larger after that experience.  I am truly amazed at what yoga teachers do, to me, there has to be so much that goes into teaching yoga, the preparation, the theming, planning the movements, adjusting for the size or demographics of the class, I have to believe it’s very difficult. 

And then, there’s Sheila Ewers.  I guess one of the biggest reasons I have such respect for Sheila is that she uses and quotes literature so often.  I was an English major in college, and I tend to always gravitate to those who study and quote literature.  But it’s way more than that.  Sheila never “phones it in”.  Her classes are very creative.  The movement is fluid, you travel to new places, in some cases, you’ve never been to where you are going, you don’t anticipate where you are going, and it’s a beautiful journey.  More importantly, she themes extremely well, and she sets the stage at the beginning of class, continues the theme throughout, and pulls  it all together in the end. 

At our yoga retreat, Sheila didn’t disappoint.  Sheila weaved a beautiful tapestry of metaphors into our yoga practice.  In many classes, Sheila pulled in some of the greats of French literature, she used “The Little Prince”, Victor Hugo, Pierre Chardin.  She also used some of our adventures during the week, and themed off of those experiences.  Each yoga class was incredible, completely different each time, and a new journey to savor. 

And there was so much more…. 

I experienced such a sensory overload during the week, each day brought a new experience, a new adventure, so much to take in, it was overwhelming.  The countryside was magical, there were vineyards everywhere, there were castles, churches, fields, hills, valleys, it was truly a magical setting. 

At one point, in yoga, Sheila raised an awareness of the senses we were experiencing.  As I look back, I taste and see:

• The breathtaking balloon ride, the sound of the flame filling our balloon, the silence shortly afterward, followed by listening to the dogs, cows and other farm animals far below.  The sight of the group of cows, lined up together, curious to see who in the hell was in their pasture with that big balloon? 
• The wine tastings, the smell of the different wines, the tastes, the wine cellars that had been in existence for hundreds of years, still providing a sanctuary for the various vintages.  I have never tasted wines this amazing in my life, and really, I probably never will again. 
• The flowers, the colors, the smells, there was such an array of vibrant and beautiful plants that we saw in the country and at the markets. 
• The cold, crisp, clear air first on the balloon ride and then on the bike trip.  On the bike ride, I actually got a splitting headache from breathing in that cold, crisp air, it felt so good, and then it felt so bad. 
• The taste of real food.  Since I got diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease about two years ago, I’ve eaten very sparsely, blandly, safely.  Sheila arranged for our chefs to cook “special” meals for me, no  butter, no creams.  For the first time in two years, I was eating real food.  The mixture of joy and thankfulness was wonderful. 
• The markets, seeing people shop for fresh fruits, vegetables, bread, meats, it was such an experience to see the vibrancy, the hustle and bustle of a Sunday morning marketplace. 
• The song of the local people speaking their melodic language.  I’ve traveled to somewhere between 10-15 countries around the world, and I’m not sure anyone can make words sound so lovely. 

TTFN 

As many of you know, I’m a huge fan of Winnie the Pooh (hence the name of my blog post).  Just like in the Hundred Acre Wood, we had our cast of characters on the yoga retreat.  I, of course, am Eeyore, and will always be Eeyore.  The misconception is and can be that I’m not having a good time because I’m Eeyore.  The truth be known, I love to be able to just be me, and be accepted for just being me. 

 On our yoga retreat, we had our share of  various other characters from the Hundred Acre Wood.  I’ll only reveal one thing about any of them, I found someone who had been born the same day, same year, as me, in the general vicinity, we were both born in western Pennsylvania.  That was truly amazing.  The only other thing I’ll reveal is that we did have some Tiggers, and I’m not so sure about the real Eeyore, but this Eeyore loves to be around Tiggers, they give me so much joy to watch and listen to. 

Thank you for bringing me here…. 

As some of you know, I’m a huge fan of Rolf Gates and read him every morning.  One of my favorite Rolf Gates days of reading talked about gratitude and being thankful.  So I start and end every yoga practice by saying to myself as Rolf suggests, “thank you for bringing me here”.  In those moments, I’m speaking to God, and I’m speaking to Laurel.  Without them, I would have never found yoga, and I wouldn’t be who I’ve become over the last few years.  Of course, I’m still a work in progress, but I’ve come a long way. 

But this thank you is broader.  There are so many people I want to thank.  As noted, vacations aren’t easy for me, and I could have fallen back, easily, into my normal routine of spending more time working than vacationing.  In fact, that was part of my plan going in.  But I didn’t, and that has less to do with me, than the place, the people, the experiences.  I truly enjoyed myself this week, and I’m so thankful for that.  I also stepped way out of my comfort zone.  I ate real food, which was huge for me, I went up in a hot air balloon, and I’m scared to death of heights, and I rode a bike for the first time in over forty years.  I stepped way out of my comfort zone, and miraculously, I didn’t die.  Yes, I’m kidding.  

In so many ways, I didn’t want this, I wanted it for Laurel, but I didn’t want it for myself, I didn’t deserve this.  But I needed it, and I loved it.  Thank you for bringing me here.

Ta-ta for now