The Joy of Travel ....

 My spidey senses were tingling

I traveled for work out to Boulder, Colorado, last week, and even under “normal” circumstances, it wasn’t starting off well.  Some idiot planned my trip, leaving Columbus on a 5:30 am flight, with a three-hour layover in Atlanta on Monday morning.  I had to get up at 3 in the morning after retrieving Laurel from the airport at about 6 on Sunday night.  So, less than 12 hours with my wife, most of them sleeping, and getting up at “0 dark 30” for a long day ahead. 

After the fun of Monday, nothing of consequence until Wednesday.  I had traveled to Boulder with my dear friend and colleague, Rick Keith, and he was able to leave early, so he flew out on Wednesday.  He had the rental car in his name, and he was concerned, but no matter, I told him, I’ve Ubered before, and I can do that for the rest of the trip.

Wednesday morning came around, and I had to get an Uber to work, and I put it in my phone, and 30+ minutes?  Really?  Most of the time when I Uber, it’s 3, 5, maybe 8 minutes, but 30+?  When the driver picked me up, I asked him, should I be concerned for my trip to the airport on Thursday?  Well, maybe so, but as long as you schedule your ride, you’ll be fine.  I was still a bit concerned, but I figured, what could go wrong?

What could go wrong, will

I had scheduled my Uber for 5 am, so I got up at 4, and headed downstairs.  My Uber App was telling me that my driver would be there at 5 or so.  Good so far.  I waited a bit, and then about 5:10, I got a notification from Uber that my ride had been canceled, no drivers available (the good news was I got a $5 credit on my next ride with Uber!).  OK, Boulder is about 45 minutes to an hour from Denver airport, so I was a bit perplexed how I would get there. 

I asked the young lady behind the desk at the Hilton Garden Inn, can you get me a taxi?  She had no idea how.  She said that the Embassy Suites (right next door) had a taxi list, and I asked if I should just go over there and ask.  The Security Guard just happened to be standing there, and he suggested to her to just call over to the Embassy Suites and get the list.  Still no real help at this point.  Although the Security Guard did say that buses run to the airport, and I could walk down the block and wait for a bus.  Somehow I didn’t see this as a great option.

I started trying to get another Uber driver.  I tried calling taxi services.  No answers.  I downloaded the Lyft App and tried them.  No drivers.  I kept surfing back and forth between Uber and Lyft, still no drivers.  The young lady told me, I got you a taxi.  Huh?  I never heard her talk to anyone?  She said, it was really weird though, it was all automated, so I didn’t talk to anyone.  My confidence wasn’t very high.  All of a sudden, I got a notice, a Lyft driver was 1 minute away.  Woo hoo!  I got a call, and the gentleman asked me where I was, he was over at the Embassy Suites.  I said, stay there, I’ll be right there.

I found the driver, and I was off to the airport.  He asked what time my flight was, 7:25, and he said, no problem, we should be there by 6:10.  We had a great conversation, he was a young guy like me, and we talked about virtually everything and anything.  All of a sudden, his phone started re-routing him.  I looked at his phone, and it was starting to show 6:30 or later for my arrival.  Well, that’s not so good.  There were some re-routes, but eventually we got to the airport a little past 6:30. 

I ran to the Delta ticket counter, and as I got there, the Delta representative had this nasty look of horror on her face.  Oh shit, I forgot my mask in my rush to get there.  I pulled it out and apologized all over myself.  I got through the airport, and I got to my gate just as they were boarding.  OK, I can relax now, I’m on my way.

What Could Go Wrong, Will (part 2)

We all boarded the plane, and we were settled in ready for the trip to Atlanta, and then on to Columbus.  I had planned this flight and timing for one main specific purpose.  Thursday night yoga with Abbe.  I love all the classes we have, but there’s just something about Abbe, she’s always so nice.  I had missed Tuesday’s class with Nicole, so I really wanted to get back in time for Abbe’s class.

We sat for a while, and then, when you’re an experienced traveler, you can start feeling, this isn’t good.  Sure enough, the pilot came on at one point, and said something was wrong with the plane.  The maintenance people were trying to fix it, and he’d let us know.  I kept flipping to my Delta App, and I saw they were showing a delay.   At one point, the pilot came back on and said, well, that didn’t work.  I flipped to the Delta App, and they bumped the time out to 9 am, which I knew meant, they have no idea.  I kept looking at my anticipated arrival in Atlanta, and I knew I’d miss my connection.  No yoga for me.

The one bit of good luck was that I had tried texting Laurel and calling her, and she hadn’t responded.  My natural inclination always goes to she’s dead, she’s kidnapped, she’s unconscious, whatever possible disaster could have happened.  I’ve been down this road before, when these situations occur, I worry the whole flight until I land, and have a reply text waiting for me.  In this case, the delay allowed Laurel to get back to me, and I knew no tragedies had occurred.

All of a sudden, the pilot came on and said, they somehow fixed the problem, we would be leaving within 15 minutes.  OK, most likely, I’d still miss my connection, but I had a shot.  We got out of Denver and on our way to Atlanta.  We landed right around the time my plane was taking off.  I still tried to get to it in time, I was only one terminal away, but I probably missed it by 15 minutes.

I headed to the Sky Club, thankfully all of my travels have allowed me to still have access, and they told me I was re-booked on a later flight.  My Delta App still had me on the previous flight, so I was theoretically up in the air at the moment, but of course not.  They couldn’t give me a seat assignment, I would get it at the gate.

What Could Go Wrong, Will (part 3)

I worked my way to the gate when it was getting time to leave.  Now, as some background, I was lucky enough to be upgraded on my previous flight to First Class due to my status, but I harbored no illusion that would happen on this flight.  To be honest, for a short flight like this, I really don’t care other than wanting to get off the plane as quickly as possible, particular after the long day I was having.

I got to the gate, and I noticed the displays.  There were no seats available in First Class, and I was the second one in line to get one of those no seats available.  I looked at the Economy Comfort seats, and there were seats available, but I wasn’t on that upgrade list.  Again, for the most part I didn’t care, other than just wanting to get off the plane quickly.  The young man had no idea why I wasn’t on the upgrade list, but he was able to put me in Economy Comfort, so that was a good thing.  As a side note, my Delta App was still telling me that I was on that other flight, and it was also telling me my suitcase was on the ground somewhere. 

As we got close to boarding, the gate agent said that there was a problem with the plane, it was too hot, they were trying to get it to cool down before they boarded, just a short delay.  A bit later, no, the plane was broken, they needed to find a new plane.  No idea when and what gate.

So I headed off again to another Sky Club to see if I could find out something about my flight.  Note, my Delta App still had me on the previous flight and my suitcase somewhere on the ground.  I asked the young lady at the Sky Club if she knew anything about my new flight.  She got a bit offensive and told me that she didn’t have any information like that, just my name, account number, personal information, but nothing about my flight.  Now, they always do have that information, which is why I asked, but at that point, I had lost my energy to argue, discuss, anything, I just moved on.

I found a seat in a very crowded Sky Club, and started texting Laurel, venting.  She sent me back a text with the universal instructions for stress – just breathe.  My elevated text back was, “I CAN’T BREATHE, I HAVE THIS STUPID MASK ON!”  Of course, you have to wear a mask throughout your travels, and it was getting to be a pretty long and frustrating day wearing that mask.

I finally found out my gate and new time of departure, and I eventually made my way to the gate.  I looked up at the display, and there were seats available in First Class, but somehow, I wasn’t on the upgrade list.  At this point, I had lost my ability to care, I was close enough to the front to get out quickly once we finally got to Columbus.

The rest of the trip was uneventful, thankfully, although I came close.  I kept thinking, the perfect end to this day would be getting a ticket on the way home.  I kept trying to watch my speed, but I was tired and anxious to get home, and at one point, I looked up, there was a police car on the side of the road, and I looked down, and I was going 80 miles per hour.  Somehow, I avoided it and didn’t get that ticket.

For as much as I travel, I’ve had quite a few experiences like this, but this one is in the top 10% or so of difficult travel days.  I think it was just the number of things that went wrong.  But also, I think post-pandemic, or still pandemic, travel is different.  I told Laurel, people, for the most part, just seem meaner.  They are relatively rude and all about themselves.  And the people working don’t seem nearly as good.  I don’t blame the young lady at the desk at the Hilton Garden Inn, but as Nancy Cox-Lupori would say, she was as lost as Alice.  She really didn’t know what to do.  I’ve always praised Delta for the great customer service they provide, but between the people and the Delta App, there was a lot to be desired, this wasn’t their best experience.

But How Was the Play Mrs. Lincoln?

I always love to find the good in an experience, and I tried and found several.  They were:

• Yes, how can I complain when I’m Diamond Medallion, get access to the Sky Club and get upgrades?  I agree.  To be fair, I paid dearly for this over the years, but still, most don’t have this luxury.  I’m very thankful for being able to go into the Sky Club and to have chances to be upgraded.
• The Lyft driver I had was a wonderful man.  I loved talking to him, he really brightened a very poorly-started day for me.
• There was a lady sitting behind me on the flight to Columbus, and she made friends with everyone around her.  This was her first flight to Columbus.  The questions started, are you from Columbus?  Where do you work?  What do you do?  Are you a Buckeye fan?  I’m a Gamecock fan.  She never met a stranger.
• On my flight to Columbus, there was a young lady sitting next to me with her, I assume, grade school daughter.  I was sitting there finishing Glennon Doyle’s “Love Warrior”, and tearing up periodically.  All of a sudden, she pulls out the Wall Street Journal, and starts reading it.  I couldn’t help think, what irony.  This picture really seems reversed.  And then I thought, no, it isn’t, or it shouldn’t be. 
• Waiting for the bags in Columbus, there was another young guy like me, but he was a former military officer, you could tell by his clothes and his backpack.  He had his granddaughter with him, she was probably 3 or 4.  I saw him take her little pink backpack, and attach it to his huge military backpack, and put it over his back.  To see this hardened military guy with this little pink backpack, I really wish I could have gotten a picture, it was really a beautiful moment.

In the end of course, I survived.  It was a long, painful day, but I also found some bright moments along the way.  Once I had the opportunity to look in the mirror when I got home, I told that idiot who planned this trip that he really screwed this one up.  But at least he has that $5 Uber credit to look forward to!

Leaving Church

 Editor’s Note: Thanks to Barton McMillan who inspired me to write this, even though he doesn’t know it.  You’re a very good man, who deserved to be treated as such.

“God wants the mainline church to die”  Reverend Allen Hoskyn

Very strong words, and I’m still not sure I believe them.  And to be fair to Allen, he spoke them to me many years ago, and I have no idea if he still believes them, or even believed them then. 

I do know that it’s time for me to take a sabbatical, or extend the sabbatical I’ve been on.  I’ve lost faith in the church, or at least the church we’ve created, and I can’t see returning for the foreseeable future.  And that’s OK.

Each time we’ve moved over our 38 years or so of marriage and raising a family, one of the first things Laurel and I would do when we moved to a new community was to find a church home.  It was up there in the priorities with getting utilities set up and emptying moving boxes and setting up our home.

Jesus has left the building

Just like with anything else in life, it hasn’t been just one thing that has dampened my enthusiasm for church.  I will say that I’ve had two very negative experiences over the past year, one at our former church, one at the seminary where I served as a Trustee, that left me really jaded toward our leadership, including me.  Those were probably the tipping points that pushed me over the edge. 

But it’s been more than that, it goes deeper, I’ve had many small events over the last few years that have caused me to hit the pause button and say church isn’t the place for me right now.  I guess part of it could be blamed on the pandemic, we lost our weekly ritual of attending church and the assorted other activities during the week.  Fundamentally though, I just believe the church has lost its way.  We have lost our way.  I know it’s an overstatement to say Jesus has left the building, but I’m not sure we are keeping Him as the focal point of what we are doing as a church.

And let’s be clear, my decision isn’t the right decision for everyone, and while it may appear that I’m painting a broad brush condemning the church, there are still many people doing a lot of great things within the church.  In fact, my next blog post is titled, “When the Church Does It Right” followed by “Faith”, which will highlight where I am on my current faith journey. 

For those who have come to know God, the whole world is a prayer mat

While I could focus on the many negative examples of why I’ve made this decision, I’d like to focus on a few positive examples of why I’ve moved on. 

The first is our yoga studios.  Each time Laurel and I have found a new yoga studio, we are welcomed into a new community.  There is no judgment, we are free to come as we are.  I have absolutely no idea if any or all of the people there are Christians, Muslims, Jews or whatever, but I don’t care, and they don’t either.  They are kind and caring.

The second has been the book club I’ve been a part of for the past year from our yoga studio in Georgia.  The class was called “Don’t Look Away”, and we read a book a month related to understanding and dismantling racism.  Each week we would gather and discuss the book we were reading, and we would share our thoughts and feelings about what we read.  Again, no judgment, we were free to say what we felt and share our beliefs.  And again, no idea if any were Christian or not, but they were kind and caring.

For me at least, I’ve been able to find Jesus more readily outside of the walls of church.  I have no idea if any of these people know Jesus, but I am finding Jesus within them.  I feel comfortable with them, I belong.  While I wouldn’t advocate or believe this is the right answer for everyone, I still believe the church serves a very useful purpose in our society, I just don’t think it holds the right answer for everyone, or at least me at the present time.

To my friends and family, no worries, I’m still a devoted follower of Jesus Christ.  I’d prefer to keep looking for and finding Jesus where He is.  And the good news is, He is everywhere, we just need to look.  In fact, I just saw Him again today in a new coffee shop we went to in Delaware called Coffeeology.

“So the last will be first and the first will be last” Matthew 20:16

And who knows, I may come back someday.  I’m hopeful that I can find a church like Nadia Bolz-Weber’s church where the people like me get the opportunity to worship with those that Jesus hung around with, the ones who are not welcome in most churches.  I believe my dear friend Dave Carr has found that in Hayward Street Church in Asheville, and hopefully someday, I will too.

 In closing, I’ll offer up some words from “Beyond Words” by Frederick Buechner.  I know, I’ve quoted him before, but seriously, he can say it so much better than I can:

Jesus said, "I am the Road, also the Truth, also the Life. No one gets to the Father apart from me." John 14:6.

He didn't say that any particular ethic, doctrine, or religion was the way, the truth, and the life. He said that he was.  He didn't say that it was by believing or doing anything in particular that you could "get to the Father." He said that it was only by him-by living, participating in, being caught up by the way of life that he embodied, that was his way.